Posted by: Mermaid | March 8, 2009

Mo3’amarat Mayo and Rou – Episode II

Once again, Meto is writing Episode II of “Mo3’amarat Mayo and Rou :D


The scene: nahar 7’argy, Al Azhar park


Mayyada sitting “Al korfosa2 al dofda3eyya” that she is famous for, wearing her huge sunglasses and in front of her a 1 litre pack of Juhayna Ananas, with a “shalimo” as big as massooret el magary elly fe share3na (mahy mafgoo3et ananas, a normal shalimo used by other people would not do with this hover-like sucking power)


El mohem, she is sitting as mentioned above, still working on Meto’s “sherz” (please refer to first episode)


Zoom in… Mayyada is totally “monhameka” fel tricot and every now and then she pauses to take a huge gulp of the ananas, and although the pack is finished (this is obvious from the deformations appearing in the pack as she keeps sucking and sucking “bemontaha al gabaroot” without showing any mercy to the poor pack that keeps sending “aswat este3’asa” very similar to my father’s snoring when he falls asleep-as usual- while watching “nashret a7’bar el sa3a tess3a” (elly bteegy 3ala el kanah el2oola, fakrenha??? yes lessa fee nas betshofha, etlammo, da abooya mahma kan, howwa elly rabbany we kabbarny we 7’allany ragel malw hdoomy)


Mayyada finally decides to stop torturing the poor pack; she looks at it, sighs, looks around her carefully from under her huge sunglasses, and after making sure that no one is watching, she throws the victimized pack behind her to disappear under the bush.


Then out of no where, she has another on in her hand, she looks at it with a wide grimace, her upper row of teeth going as down as her chin, she stabs the new prey with another huge shalimo and goes on again…


Suddenly Rou comes running, raising both arms up and screaming


“el7a2eeny ya mayoooooooooo


Mayyada quickly hides the juice behind her back, at the same moment when Rou is just in front of her


M: My Goodnes!!! Fee eh ya Rou? 7’addeteeny

R: Karsa, moseeba, mesh 3arfa a3mel eh

M: What happened?

R: Camel rage3 el osboo3 el gayy and he wants to give a presentation about Spain,we 3awez makan yekaffy meet wa7ed, ageblo mnen makan yekaffy el bashareyya dy?

M: Tayyeb why didn’t you tell him to give it here? (tab3an the “R” is pronounced something like 7ad byetkarra3 to emphasize the British accent that Mayyada is famous for) It’s a lovely place

R: “here” eh bass???- she pronounces it the same way as Mayyada, with the same takree3a impression- enty mesh shayfa el donya bard ezzay?

M: Yes, it is, lovely weather (the “R” is in the same way as mentioned above) I love it, it’s wonderful…. (Tab3an dy massada2et we hatebtedy teddey el maskeena Rou mo7adra fel sheta we awa7’er el sheta)

R: Lovely eh bass enty Kaman, we need a closed place yekaffy 100 sha7’s

M: Tayyeb do you have any options?

R: Yes, fy maktabet mobarak ta7t re3ayet el sayyeda el fadela mama Suzan

M: Tab that’s great, ommal fen el problem?

R: (to herself: allahoma tawellek ya ro7, aboos eedek ya Mayyada ana mesh na2saky) 3ayzeen gawab rassmy men el group yashmal 7’etab mowaggah lelsayyed ra2ees al maktaba wa ya7’oss belshokr al sayyed ra2ees el gomhooreyya wa kol man tafaddal bemowasatena bel7oddor wal bark wa la arakom Allah makrrohan fe 3azeezen ladaykom

M: Rou, I can’t believe you, you must be kidding

R: I’m not kidding, begad 3ayzeen gawab rassmy mo3akkad malyan tafasseel wenty 3arfa ana maleesh fel sekka dy

M: Bass since this is the only possible way, then we have to do it

R: Hmmm tayyeb, el moshkela ba2a ennohom 3ayzeen tawkee3 rassmy men el modeer

M: Which modeer?

R: El rayyes… el kebeer bet3 el magmoo3a ya3ny (to herself: heyya malaha ba2et 3’abeyya keda leh, haykoon modeer eh ya3ny, da eh ya rabby el balawy dy?)

M: But as far as I know the group has a moderator not a modeer (again the famous “R”, this time the R in modeer is also pronounced the same way although it is an Arabic word)

R: Bezzapt , maheyya dy el karsa

M: La2 wala karsa wala 7aga, I have an idea

R: (to herself: ostor yally btostor) 2ooly

M: You write the letter and sign it as “monassek el magmoo3a”

R: Mo 2eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeh?

M: Monassek Al magmoo3a!!

R: Eh monassek el magmoo3a dy Kaman?

M: Monassek el magmoo3a is… is el sha7’s who is mass2ool 3an el moderation wel events we keda.

R: Mesh 3arfa… mesh 7assaha temshy

M: It does, I think it’s the most suitable title ya Rou

R: Ba2ollek eh ana et7’ana2t … ana hamshy we lama Camel yeegy ye7elaha 7allal.

M: No ya Rou, this is not the right attitude, as a moderator, you have to be more responsible and…

R: Ba2ollek eh, ana mesh na2saky, 7’alleeky fel tricot elly enty sha3’la feeh men ayyam el mamaleek da, ana mashya… (Rou leaves)

M: (Sighs) Heyya leh el nass ba2et so unpersistent? Walla ana elly el moshkela feyya? Yalla, ahy meshyet, heyya 7orra. Amma al7a2 ashta3’al shwayya felsherz bta3 meto la7san fade7ny.


She gets the juice from behind her and takes a huge gulp and goes back to knitting. 

– The End-



Episode I



  1. LOL this is absolutely hilarious!!

    Meto just knows you too well ya Doodz! :P Bas Mayada 3omraha matermy garbash under the bush as this would be “an uncivilized manner” wl R pronounced zay ma Meto explained fo2 :P

    Chapeau to Meto :)

    Can’t wait for episode III!!

  2. mmm garbash? what the heck is garbash???? saba7 el sotal! ok i meant to say garbage :D

  3. For the first time in a long time I kept laughing and laughing and laughing while reading this…it appears Meto has a genius talent for humor and caricature!!
    Thanks for sharing and making me start the day with a very big smile.

  4. Ya Sola… shofty ya Setty ostaz Meto hareeny tarya2a ezay? :) And YES, I would NEVER throw “garbash” under a bush ;) (ool Anglish ool za tayem :P)

    Yes, Meto knows me and Rou quite well :)

    Saba7ek foll ya 7ayaty :) (KISS)

  5. loool… This is exactly what happen to me and to Rou everytime Meto shares with us one of his episodes ya Nadia :D We keep laughing hysterically non-stop :D

    I never knew actually that he has this sharp sense of humor except lately :)

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