Posted by: Mermaid | March 8, 2011

Off and back on

I always had a clear vision; I had a clear opinion about almost everything in my life. I cannot remember a time in my life where everything was blurry as it is now. I have been just tip-toeing on my e-mails and FB. Sometimes spending a whole day without checking them which is very not me. Wanting to help out the country in every direction and ending up by doing nothing at all. Being exposed to the rottenness of the regime is a little bit less than traumatic. And the freedom that we were deprived of for all our lives, when we’ve gained it at last, we become offensive, sarcastic and narrow-minded to the utmost extent. I’ve read an article a few months ago by an Egyptian writer that Egyptians are not good at accepting “the other”. Now, I can see this clear as the sun!

Most of the above was written in the last few hours of a two-week depressed state! Besides what I mentioned above about FB and e-mails, I did not want to talk to anyone. I see people’s names on my mobile phone and I close my eyes and say: “I don’t wanna talk!”. I leave it ring for a while and don’t call back. I only picked up on very, very few people. Same case with BBMs. My energy level was -50. I was pissed off, too, from many people. And from myself as well. And to top it all, I started a strict diet. Not having sweets (chocolates, cakes and all the goodies) made me in an edgy mood all the time. What has changed? I am not sure! I just think it’s time to get a grip. I’ll still take it slow with FB because it turned out to be a source of negative energy for me. I’ll try to pick 2-3 channels through which I can help the country and focus on them. Running in all directions won’t get me anywhere. As Ibraheem once said, less chairs, more quality time on each.

Mayada, FOCUS and know your destination as you always did. Do not mind the bumps on the road; they’d wake you up when you doze off on the driving wheel. And most importantly, do not forget to enjoy the ride :)



  1. Mermaada,

    Thank you for translating the haunting piece by the Choir Project. I had not meant this as a task, I just don’t too much translating on my site because I want the readers of my site who don’t know Arabic to really feel they are missing something. Which they are. I hope this makes some sense.

    I’ve been off line the past few days myself. Sometimes it’s so hard to deal with how bad things are. . .

    But Egypt has struck a chord all over the world. I hope your people will continue your journey.

    Keep thinking and writing. You never know what a little bird will chirp into your ear. Solomon understood this. :-)

    صاحبك الامريكي

    م ط

  2. السلام عليكم :

    انا عارفة انت بتتكلمي عن ايه…بس انا بدخل في الحالة دة بمعدلات اكبر منك…و بكون مستاءة من نفسي جدا اني مش عارفة اخرج نفسي من اللي انا فيه..و من اني اساسا سمحت لهيك مشاعر انها تجتاحني !! ..

    بس انت دلوقتي عندك مسؤولية ..انت لازم تساهمي في انك تخلي بكرة احسن ..و لو بحاجة بسيطة..انك ما تسمحيش لواحدة زيك..انها تنسحب..لان لو اللي زيك انسحبوا….تفتكري مين اللي حيفضل؟؟و اللي حيفضل حيعمل ايه؟؟

    الكلام سهل ..انا عارفة…بس انا بدعي ربنا انه يعطيني و يعطيك و يعطي كل واحد عنده حلم انه يلاقي طريقه..مش بس يلاقي طريقه..انما يقدر يكمل فيه للنهاية..لان الاستمرار يحتاج لقوة ..و قوة كبيرة..ارجو ان يمدنا الله بها!!..

    انا رغيت كتير..بس اتمنى اشوفك دائما مبتسمة و متفائلة..!!! و ابقي قلمك في يدك!!

  3. MT,

    “Mermaaada” :)))

    I hope the translation was good. Cultural translation is the most difficult. I hope your blog readers would at least get the essence of the song.

    Am back… not full fledged. But I am trying not to give in the tempting withdrawal.

    I know you pray for us, dear MT! :)

    وعليكم السلام عروبة

    لو واحدة زيي إنسحبت إتأكدي إن في أحسن منها مييييت مرة :). المسئولية هي فعلا اللي بتخرجني من القوقعة اللي كنت فيها. أنا عارفة دلوقتي إن البلد محتاجة كل واحد فينا.

    آمين يا رب… دعواتك دايما.. ليا ولمصر :)

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