I am very late this year in writing my end of year post. I always start thinking about it from November. I cannot believe I waited till the last two hours of the year to write it! (last minuter to the bone!)
What a year! I cannot believe it was that eventful! Started with a very bad start; bombing a church in Alexandria in new year’s eve, several people killed, and many injured. And to make it even worse, a salafi young man was caught by the police and tortured to death to confess he bombed the church – which was not the case but the police needed a scapegoat! But the good thing is that sadness and fear made us “one”. It unified us. Khaled Saeed, the ridiculous parliament elections in November 2010, the church bombing… on top of all this, years and years of oppression, of knowing that you can disappear any moment you think of opposing the regime… all this lead to the great Egyptian Revolution. I still cannot believe it happened! And I cannot believe I was part of it! (More to come on a separate post on the late events of the revolution). We’re not free yet. But at least we got rid of our fear which is a HUGE thing. We know that SCAF can arrest anyone, kill anyone but we still talk and scream asking for the rights of the martyrs and for our rights. We will be free! We will be free inshAllah!
On a personal level, I have one priceless blessing with orange feet in my life. Can I ask for more? :) And the other jewel of my life, Nahla :) May you two remain just the way you are, and may you tolerate my troublesome, burdening existence. I know you will because I know you know how much you mean to me. The world and beyond.
Meto, I grrr at him a lot but I cannot imagine my life without him. Rou, a close and dear friend for a fifth year. I know I can always depend on her for anything. Sola, the love and wise (and cute) voice in my life :) God bless you, dears.
The past two years witnessed a decreased level of tears that was made up this year. Actually the amount of tears shed this year would suffice for four years ahead. Never knew what “chocking with tears” meant before this year. But am all dry now :) Yet as much as it was a year of tears, it was a year of heart-warming giggles and fresh smiles. Praise to God for everything.
Building on the above, I was touched to the core when a few friends in distress asked me to pray for them. You remember only dear ones when you’re in distress (even if you do not talk frequently). And this is what I did as well. At that dark time of the year when I curled up and hid in a damp corner of me, I asked a few to pray for me. And I know that because of their sincere prayers I am still intact in one piece. I am grateful to speechlessness!
In 2011, I wanted to lose a specific number of kilograms off my weight. And I did. But a few months later, I gained the whole package back. I started again and am 30% done with the goal. One thing I know about me. I am a fighter. When I stumble down and have all my face and clothes smudged in mud, I stand up, shake it all off and start again. It is the same thing with my relationship with God. I sin. I plead for forgiveness. I sin again. And plead for forgiveness again. I do not give up on His forgiveness and graciousness because I know they are boundless.
An inevitable loss I have faced this year, and still facing. A heartbreaking one. But I am strong. I will be fine. I will be fine inshAllah. John Green says: “We need never be hopeless, because we can never be irreparably broken.”
New year’s resolutions: lose the extra weight, keep working out, be more tolerant, make your heart (not just your mind) accept losses, be kinder, less angry, write more, embrace people just the way they are.
I end the year with chocolate, dark. Just the way I like it. Dark is not bad. It is rich and deep.
I leave you with a quote from New Year’s Eve movie.
“Claire: It’s suspended there to remind us before we pop the champagne and celebrate the New Year, to stop and reflect on the year that has gone by. To remember both our triumphs and our missteps – our promises made, and broken. The times we opened ourselves up to great adventures – or closed ourselves down, for fear of getting hurt. Because that’s what New Year’s is all about: getting another chance. A chance to forgive, to do better, to do more, to give more, to love more. And stop worrying about ‘what if’ and start embracing what would be. So when that ball drops at midnight – and it will drop – let’s remember to be nice to each other, kind to each other. And not just tonight but all year long.”